tomorrow.

tomorrow, tomorrow you shall rest, up there with the angels. you shall feel no more pain, but down here thats all i can feel. i would say i am scared of loosing you but its too late i already have. its to late, i cant turn the clock back & see your face one last time. which hurts. hurts me down deep, causes those tears which stroll down my face. when i found out i couldnt understand it, you still had life in you, a family and friends, why did you have to go. why?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrpSjXo6ah0&feature=avmsc2

final week.

5 more days..
5 more days of year ten.
Until the summer i have been waiting for right?
I really don't think its gonna be, what i want:/ I want it to be like amazing because it's my last summer before i finish school for well forever. wow that sounds kinda scary tbh. but i just have this feeling its gonna be shit. my friends gonna go on holiday for 3 WEEKS, 21 DAYS. i know it sounds silly but i know i'm gonna miss her alot:/ and well recently i like to keep everything which is precious to me close. i know shes not actually going anywhere but i guess i worry alot. because recently somethings happen which i didnt expect, and it shook me up. its hard enough losing someone but losing someone unexpectily well that hits you ten times harder. cant exactly explain it:/ but makes you feel empty, and very causious of the things around you & greatful for what you have, but very sensitive and well i dont need to feel any more sensitive bad enough as it is.

ahhhh i wrote this a couple days agoo.. but i didnt really finish it i didnt really no what else to write and well i dont no what to write now either[a] haa. WOW ceeeb to write anymore lets just BLOG it baby.

today.

July 1st 2010.. change.

What can we take on trust
in this uncertain life? Happiness, greatness,
pride - nothing is secure, nothing keeps.
~Euripides, Hecuba


i sit here alone in my bed thinking back to a year ago, thinking about the silly conversations and the voices which made me laugh until my stomache hurts. thinking back to the smiles the tears, the hurt and the never ending wheel of change. do you ever wonder what things would be like if that change didnt happen if those few words you said werent said, or a moment in your life would just dissapear and then everything would be perfect. but what is perfect, because when one person goes up, someone else goes down, when one person is born another dies. sometimes being perfect isnt the answer even though it may seem like the only answer.

but dont you hate it when every where you go someone tells you something different, nobodys perfect, practise makes perfect.. so which is it? everything happens for a reason, sometimes not everything has a reason it just happens.. soo which is it? well its neither, life has no rules or boundries, only the ones we have put here, to look after and respect the people around us. to stop the hurt, that we have. the cold hearted lies, the back stabbing feelings, the warm tears which stroll down your face one by one, no one likes those feelings so why do we carry on doing things, which make us cause all of that. no humans perfect, but every human knows how they like to be treated, so why dont we all treat everyone equally.

then comes that feeling which you can't stop, missing someone or something. walking around talking about the world around you, falling to the floor with laughter because your best friend just does something extreamly stupid and you can't help but laugh, snuggling up with your covers and some munch, its those little memories that might mean nothing to someone else but you and the people you shared them with mean alot.

the change i've taken. i know longer look at life and see only faults, i look at my life and see how lucky i have been, to be blessed with amazing people. i may have lost some but not all completely no matter what happens, they will always have a place in me and my life, because they've all had a impact upon me. i love my friends, family & boy friend soo much, sometimes its hard to believe, even thought at time i stress my self out and complain and moan and become one of the most annoying people ever, i hope i will always remain close to them all, but change is making its path, but change doesn't always have to happen, it only happens if you let it, your in charge of your life, no one else, you have people who guide you but no one else can deside how you live your life, they cant tell you who you love, who you hate, when you want to do something and how you want to do it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_kqoJJVDkE i am who i am:) [8]

a article i found:] http://www.life-with-confidence.com/changewithconfidence.html#dHNaCWeUb1deTMzT enjoy <3



“Take control of your consistent emotions and begin to consciously and deliberately reshape your daily experience of life.”