jews

haaa btw i did not name this blog christoper wilkes did[a] muhaaa.
anyhowww this is a pretty random blog because i felt like writing one cause me & georgie radford are the bees knees, well if bees had knees we would be[a] right now i feeeel like eating a bunch of cookies with some ben and jerries cookie dough icecream while watchinggg an amazingly funny film:)

while finding that LUSH picturee, i found these!:O

i would alsoo love to goo very hyppppperr on sugarrry fooood & drinkkk & eat a really nicee meaaal muha I LOVE food, if you didnt no already[a] this is how i feel after some red bulll;]


mmm..... :)


my other problem is i want these REALLY nice shoes but there £180 & there cookie monster so i think thats abit too much:/ so i think i am gonnna get some fit converses & hopefully customise them or get some fit nike onessss;]




MUHHAA:] i would also loveeee MORE clothes, but dont i always & my hair cut now that sounds goood to me tbqh.

well christopher wanted a special mention so here you are, haa well what can i say i am soooooo glad we aree close again even if you think i am a special retard[a] its not my fault i can't swim properllyy & i have to smile at word cookies & i am just plain weird to be honest:/ yeeeh but i loves talking to you always cheeer me up when you dont even trrry, your still my number one & raver bestest MUHA(: love you christoper:]

arghhhhh.

hurting on the inside, keeping it all locked in, pretending it doesn't bother you, or it doesn't matter but then something just pushes you & it all comes out. the tears come running, you start to shake and all you wanna do is curl up and never move. why do people lie, why do they say they're always there, why do they say they care about you when really they dont give a fuck. i just want to forget you, but i can't, its because no matter how little i mean to you, it doesnt matter cause your always gonna mean something to me if i like it or not, you gained my friendship you gained my trust, you've left me feeling stupid, why did i ever let you in? and as for you, you've lied, you've hurt me so bad, it doesnt feel like its gonna go away, but i couldnt let you go, cause i knew i would regret it, but now i am left so unsure on what to do, i think i am just gonna try stay away, because all i seem to do is cause you or i hurt.

someone once told me your in life to live it and thats what your doing, dont worry about anyone else because you havnt done anything wrong. so i'm gonna try listen to her, cause i am fed up of this feeeling.

thank you to my best friends they mean everything to me, always being there through thick & thin, i love you guys <3

my fault.

is it my fault you are the way you are? is it my fault, our friendship has sunk to nothing, is it my fault you've gone from happy to sad, did i just make every thing 10 times worse. i did, didnt i? i did all of this, was i being selfish? did i actually think about what would happen, atleast i thought i did. i never meant to effect you like this, i would never ever think of hurting you like this has, but theres nothing i can do, because its out of my control. i do keep trying to make things better, but i can't do it, it just doesn't work. it makes me so angry & upset, i never wanted this to happen, i was just trying to do something which made me happy, which it has it really has, but at the same time, i've lost someone, who i thought would be by my side forver, but they can't anymore, they say they're there, but are they, are they really? i havnt just effected us though, have i? i've effected things with others as well. i've fucked things up, i've fucked things up real good. i'm sorry.