no longer.

i waited and waited but i knew it wasnt coming, i wished, i begged, i prayed but that wasn't about to change anything, i miss you and this proberly sounds horrible but i don't know why, i never saw you, well a few times a year, but i miss you and it hurts you were my family, i miss seeing you those couple days a year, i miss the birthday cards, i miss your voice asking me how have i been & if i would like a drink, it sounds so stupid, but to me it isnt. i know your in a better place, i know i really do but nothing can stop me missing you. when i opened up my cards this year, trying not to break into tears knowing i wouldnt get one from you and uncle douglus, rip auntie joyce, i love you and will always miss you.

loosing someone can be hard, friend or family member, neighbour or pet, i have lost one of each in the past 2 years and i am telling you it hasnt been easy. but i know crying isnt going to help, all i can do is treasure the time i had with them and be greatful i knew them. auntie joyce, jackie, jamie and patchie and my baby sheba and ozzy rip i love you all. see you in heaven.

missing someone who you havn't met, is that possible? missing some who was never a big part of your life, but you wanted them to be. wishing things went different so they would still be here. wishing someone cared that little bit more about you. wanting to know what it feels like to have people like that in your life. you only live once and well somedays i just wish i had you lot there.

sorry if this blog sounds sad, i am happy just a few things on shannons mind:)